Archive for How My Mind Works

Everything Happens for a Reason

Are you tired of vapid motivational messages? So am I.

Are you tired of vapid motivational messages? So am I.

Are you tired of vapid motivational messages? So am I.

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Yet Another You Can Be Defined (Version A Type)

Huffington Post has a post, probably just reblogged from elsewhere, 16 Signs You’re a Little Type A wherein they reenforce that everyone can fit into a box. Much like a horoscope one can easily read into these diagnoses. Rather than take them at face value I decided to have a little fun with them.

Waiting in long lines kills you a little bit inside.
I don’t wait in lines, there are not many events or items that warrant waiting in a line.

You’ve been described as a perfectionist, overachiever, workaholic or all of the above.
Overacheiver only because the competition sucks

You bite your nails or grind your teeth.
I used but it makes your fingers look gross so I stopped because I have discipline.

You have a serious phobia of wasting time.
Time isn’t wasted when you’re getting wasted.

You’re highly conscientious.
Don’t think that because I understand I care

You’ve always been a bit of a catastrophist.
I plan for the worst and welcome the end of humanity.

You frequently talk over and interrupt people.
Most people don’t have anything good to say, I just don’t like motherfuckers, I haven’t meet too many motherfuckers I like.

You have a hard time falling asleep at night.
Nothing that a stiff drink can’t help

People can’t keep up with you — in conversation or on the sidewalk.
I’m usually three steps ahead of you in converstaion I skip the irreveleant details b/c you SHOULD be able to fill them in but you often cannot.

You put more energy into your career than your relationships
I learned to how to properly manage my time long ago.

Relaxing can be hard work for you.
NOPE

You have a low tolerance for incompetence.
Results or GTFO

You’d be lost without your to-do list.
You’d be lost with my to-do list.

At work, everything is urgent.
Nope, I set my priorities.

You’re sensitive to stress.
Stress free, if no one is going to die then it’s not that important.

You make it happen.
Yep, I get shit done.

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Popular Doesn’t Mean Good

Spotify suggested this today:

Straight up now tell me do I really want to oppress forever.

Straight up now tell me do I really want to oppress forever.

Hey Spotify,

Apartheid was popular when I was in high school as well, it doesn’t mean I want to relive it.

Thanks,
Dan

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In the Spirit of Cyber Monday

For Cyber Monday my family all gathers around a Google Hangout and combines all of our discount codes to take advantage of the one family member with a Prime account. This tradition started in the 1800s when my great-great-grandfather was the first person in his town with an internet connection. Dialup over telegraph, talk about conserving bandwidth he didn’t even load JavaScript or Images and loading Flash would get you removed from the will.

Happy Cyber Monday everyone may your connection be strong, your shopping cart full and discount codes be plentiful.

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If You See Something Say Something

If you want amateur security you should hire amateurs. A great example of the effectiveness of the “See something, say something campaign” or as I call it “Start Snitching”

Gimme a break.

Gimme a break.

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Netflix – HBOGO and the Future

Reed Hastings always says “Netflix needs to become HBO before HBO becomes Netflix.” If the interface of HBOGO is any indication Netflix will be the Blockbuster of online video if they don’t tighten up their game.

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