Tag Archive for Planters

Breaking News – Romney Narrows VP Picks

Common Folk Collective’s top secret political operative has some inside news on Mitt Romney’s potential VP pick. Romney has narrowed the list down to two candidates, the Planter’s Peanut Guy and the Monopoly Guy.

Each choice has strong credentials. Peanut has been involved in social circles since the early 1900s and was part of a program to provide low cost meals to workers. He also showed bipartisan support by working with Jimmy Carter, a long time ally, on trying to bring peace to the Middle East. Monopoly has been a staple of the NY real estate market and by building hotels all along the East Coast has a track record of creating jobs.

Both candidates also come with baggage that could cost Romney as well. Many people are allergic to Peanut and his close association with Kraft Foods doesn’t help Romney’s Wall Street association. Additionally his close association with Jimmy Carter may cost some Tea Party votes. Monopoly on the other hand is viewed by some as a fluff candidate because of a second place finish in a beauty contest. Monopoly has also been know to take over whole neighborhoods building luxury hotels and charging exorbitant rent. Monopoly will also have to likely explain his use of the get out of jail free card.

Don’t forget to pick up your very own copy of George Romney’s biography. As drab as it may sound, it’s really a fascinating read about a forward thinking man with progressive ideas about politics, race, and capitalism. Andrew Sullivan from the Daily Beast says “In many ways, George Romney shows what capitalism can achieve; and Mitt Romney reveals how degenerate so much of it has become.”

Romney’s Way: A Man and an Idea (Biography of George Romney, Mitt’s father)

*Ed. note- Looks like Romney went with the peanut

Share